Funny Stories From Your Gigs

[hellbound1972 0]

Not sure this has been done but everyone has a funny story from their years of experience so I'll start.

 

 

The groom asking me to play some music whilst the entire party and staff waited outside the hotel for the fire brigade to give us the all clear to return after fire alarm sounded, he genuinely wanted me to return to the hall and carry on playing so that his guests in the car park didn't get bored.

 

 

 

 

[qcdiscodynamic 0]

I had a fire related one myself. Back in the day when people could smoke indoors, some numpty decided to put their cigarette but into a bin inside the venue! The darn thing set the bin liner on fire and caused the fire alarms to go off. Everybody had to vacate for the fire to be located, put out and the building to be checked.

 

Fortunately nothing was damaged but this happened in the middle of January and it was freezing outside.y As per usual quite a lot of people weren't exactly best dressed for January! I got talking to some guy who said, "oh you've got to play 'Disco Inferno' when we go back in as the first song," which naturally I did! The crowd responded well to it thankfully.

 

I felt a bit sorry for the clients though, one of whom I knew from school, because they lost out on some 40 minutes all down to some careless plonker.

 

 

[hellbound1972 0]

I had a fire alarm one at a hotel and whilst standing outside with the guests waiting for an hour for the fire brigade to give the all clear the bride asked me to go back in and start playing as the guests were getting bored, I did point out that NO ONE was allowed into the hotel till the fire brigade to give the all clear which she didn't understand.

 

She then told the hotel that i should play for an extra hour and a half as I hadn't done the full set and luckilly for me none of the staff wanted to stay until 2.30!

 

 

and...

 

The Best man who came up onto the balcony I was Djing from and said "play YMCA, it will get people dancing" (at 7.45!)

 

I explained that as no one was actually in the hall yet and the bride and groom hadn't done the first dance it wouldn't do anything this early in the evening.

 

Queue a rant about how crap I was and that he had been doing it for years etc etc.

 

Every 10 minutes he came up and complained that I wasn't playing Blame it on the boogie/dancing queen/anything else that you have to be a little drunk for.

 

The room filled up and the groom was standing next to me talking about his first dance and up comes the best man to moan at me and him about me.

 

First dance done and the dancefloor has alot of people on it, up comes the best man to yet again complain that not everyone is dancing and to play this that and the other and how good he is and how crap I am.

 

By this point I was at breaking point to I picked up the mic, turned down the music and announced to the crowd that the gentleman standing next to me seems to know what he is doing so i am passing it over to him.

 

I put mic down and walked away leaving the best man on the balcony staring at the crowd whilst they shouted "go on dave"

With a look of fear on his face, he then asked me to come back and carry on and proceeded to run back down stairs.

 

10 minutes after the groom came and shook my hand for making his best man feel so stupid and told me i was doing a wonderful job.

 

[qcdiscodynamic 0]

^^That best man sounded as obnoxious as one that I dealt with a few years ago who ended up getting asked to leave because he was upsetting pretty much everybody. There were casino tables in another room on that occasion and quite a lot of people went to investigate them after the first dance, which was what the bride & groom wanted. I was left with a few guests who had children in the room I was based in and so I started catering for them, which was well received.

 

However, the best man (who was rather intoxicated) was patrolling and came up to me to 'remind' me that it was a wedding party and not a school disco. Those were his words - "I'm reminding you..." I wasn't actually playing anything that was a kid's party song but I guess he saw children dancing and went beserk. He demanded to use a mic and wanted to come behind the stand but he wasn't steady on his feet and refused to put the pint of beer, which was being spilled in every direction, down. I'm sure most of us are familiar with this situation!

 

I was reluctant to give him the mic because he was hostile and I thought he was likely to say something that would wind up the other guests with children. I said I wasn't going to give him a microphone in case he had an accident with the beer and he tried the "do you know who you're talking to? I'm the best man," routine. I explained that he wanted to use my equipment and if I didn't think it was safe for someone to use my equipment, that was the end of the matter.

 

He stormed off and then apparently wound up one of the guys who was running the casino tables by, yes, telling them how to do their job!

 

 

 

On the subject of other events preventing me from playing a full set, I also have a similar tale to hellbound's. On my occasion I was piggy in the middle between the clients and the venue.

 

I was doing a wedding party that was running well behind time. I arrived at the agreed time of 6pm (venue wouldn't let me set up earlier in the day) and was told that I wouldn't even be able to get into the room because the tables were set out for the meal and they'd only just started serving the first of five courses! I was advised to come back in an hour or so. I left my mobile number and ended up driving to a nearby town to get some food.

 

Even when I returned at 7.30pm, they were still eating and I couldn't get in. Then they had the speeches and then the room had to be cleared. By the time I was allowed in to set up (and by this time I'd started reading the Saturday newspaper for a second time) it had gone 9pm and I couldn't just wave a wand and get things set up in 5 minutes, which is what I think was expected.

 

Sadly the venue only had a 12.00am licence and effectively I'd only done 2 and a bit hours out of a possible 5.

'Can't you play on longer? We were told we'd get a 5 hour disco and you only came in at gone 9."

I explained I was more than happy to play on but it wasn't my decision. Fortunately they then went to speak to the venue staff and the answer was a 'no.' I was told to pack up and so started doing so. I then got asked to stop by the bride who was arguing with the venue staff. She was not a happy customer.

 

Thankfully the venue got the blame but even I wasn't happy.

[Derek Paul 0]

Two quick stories, Fire Alarm first

 

Back in the late 90’s I was playing a large conference room in the West Midlands. Over 500 attendees, dinner finished, orchestra finish, and its party time. The dance floor’s packed and everyone’s having a great time, when the fire alarm sounds. The whole hotel empties onto the car park, my 500 guest plus all the hotel guests. At some point word starts to spread that it was the “DJ’s Smoke Machine”. Now yes I was using a smoke machine, but I had checked with the facility that is was OK. However there is no way to explain that to the 100’s of disgruntled people stood on a cold car park at midnight. I snuck back into the building; I thought it safer than the car park.

 

Time to Finish

 

A few years ago, shortly after moving to the USA, I am playing a wedding in the middle of nowhere. It’s about 1am and the party is going strong, about 100 very drunk guests and me. At this point the local sheriff arrives (and I mean sheriff, silver star, cowboy hat and six shooter the whole deal). He walks up to me and simple says “Shut it Down.” I said I’d need to talk to the groom, who was paying, but without hesitating he told me he would confiscate my gear if I did not cut the music immediately. I look at the party and knew that just cutting the music was a VERY BAD idea. I tried one last time, I asked if I could play one last track, a slow dance, at a lower volume. I explained that he (the sheriff) and I were the only two sober people there. I think the realized the possible repercussions of just stopping abruptly, and agreed to a last dance. An hour later the gears in the truck, I’m paid and there is still a circle of very drunk guests surrounding the sheriff asking for “Just One More.” I have to give the guy a lot of credit, he just stood there saying “Sorry the Parties Over’ not once did he raise his voice or lose it, despite the very drunk questioning. I shook a few hands, said my goodbyes and checked that the sheriff was going to be OK. To this day I still wonder how long the he was there after I left

 

[DJ Nonstop 0]

hi ! hay thật đó tôi thích phong cách của bạn :)

[McCardle 1]

hi ! hay thật đó tôi thích phong cách của bạn :)

 

Eh?

[fester 0]

Eh?

 

hi! or so I like your style

 

Me love you long time!!! Sucky *ucky ten dolla!!

[EssexDiscoDJ 0]

Loving the Sheriff story...Thanks for sharing that one.

 

This got me thinking though, wouldn't it be great to always carry a "decoy DJ". Someone who can field all the daft requests, tell drunken guests that they can "have a go", explain why slipknot is inappropriate and keep the "one more song" crowd busy while you sneak the gear out the back door.

 

Just an idea.

[McCardle 1]

wouldn't it be great to always carry a "decoy DJ"

 

Or something like a DJ version of the Autopilot in "Airplane?"

 

 

http://aboudjaffar.blog.lemonde.fr/files/2013/05/bilde.jpeg

Edited August 1, 2013 by McCardle