Guaranteed Guests & Phrases

[NickF 0]

Hi, I’m new to the forum and have spent the last day reading over the posts with much interest.

 

I’m based in Bristol and do a mixture of Club & Mobile work and have been doing so for the last 5 years.

 

I feel that at every event i do i always see the same sort of character or have certain things said to me and was wondering if its the same everywhere or if certain regions have different recognisable traits.

 

 

1) "I’m a dj too" - The guest who feels they have to tell you they too are a DJ, i then have to be as polite as I can to them while they tell me what they would be doing.

 

2) "Play this everyone will dance" - Ok so i understand you would like to hear this song but i doubt you have surveyed everyone in the room to see if they will all get up and dance.

 

3) "Play something good!" or "What’s this !?!"

 

4) Drunk Smelly Sweaty Man who insists on making contact with you (Shaking Hands - Arm Round Shoulder or Just Really close proximity) - I really hope this is not just me!

 

5) Squeeze Past Lady - Normally a lady past her 30's who picks the most awkward route to get past your equipment to talk to you, can involve squeezing under speaker stand or climbing over something. She normally doesn’t try to talk to you before she decides to come behind the desk and won’t be looking at you as she does her awkward squeezing:cense: If she fails this she will be the one who trys to talk to you right next to the speaker so neither of you can hear.

 

6) The Inquisitive child (or two) - The child who will stand next to you and watch what you do, possibly try to use your mic, stick his face in your smoke machine and ask lots of questions.

 

7) The CD Grabbers - Someone who will come up and just start to look through your CD's without asking, if you have left them in public reach.

 

8) "Play some R&B/D&B"

 

9) The Virgin - Normally a girl aged 18 - 21 dressed as a school girl or in some revealing clothing who will either request like a virgin or if not will shout "This is my song" in a Vicky Pollard accent when it comes on. (Vicky pollard accent native to Bristol)

 

10) The Party Pooper - Will normally be a female in her 40's that will be dancing with friends and will not be liking the music (even though everyone else is) and will try and convince her friends to go sit down through comments such as "What’s this" or "fed-up" body language.

 

Any that are just in my imagination do you think, or are there ones I’ve missed off the list.

 

[deejaymitch 0]

You're spot on. I reckon we could all expand on those chartacteristics a bit, and add a few more characters of our own. But we all see this people all the time. Great, isn't it?

[TonyB 0]

Yep, all part of a normal nights work.

 

With regards to 4 above, New Years Eve it was a drunk, nice smelling, sweaty female who became my best friend for the night and kept wanting to drag me onto the dancefloor (I did succumb once) so its not always bad :)

 

NYE, a chap dressed as Ozzy Osbourne kept making gestures and shrugging his shoulders as though he wasn't impressed when I put certain tracks on. At the end of the night when I was using the mic to wrap up he came over and offered me his hand. I thought he wanted to make a quick speech so I offered him the mic. But he came over to thank me and shake my hand.

[Paul Smith 0]

Also see This Topic tongue out icon

[robbiedj 0]

 

 

8) "Play some R&B/D&B"

 

 

 

You left out the rest of the conversation:-

 

"Certainly, what would you like?"

 

"Er, dunno, um, you know mate" (wanders off with confused look)

 

And my favourite punter, who comes up while you are playing Bob Marley to ask "Got any reggae, mate?"

[TonyB 0]

and also:

Drinks glasses on the bass bins

Drunks leaning over your decks with a drink in their hand

Someone asking if you can play a track that goes da de da de da, you know the one, was a big hit a while ago.

Just one more at the end.

The final request when you've switched everything off and started to pack away

"Can I use your mic to MC?"

"Can you play track no.xx from my Ipod?"

Punters twisting the speakers around.

[jackrichards 0]

Spot on there mate! A certainty at all of my gigs!

[robbiedj 0]

Someone asking if you can play a track that goes da de da de da, you know the one, was a big hit a while ago.

 

 

Or the one by "that fellow with the black hair, something about love. It was in the charts last year"

 

And the punter who thinks he/she knows the title ......... but doesn't.

 

I've played "The La La song" (Can't Get You Out Of My Head)

 

"Walk On" (You'll Never Walk Alone)

 

"Believe Me by Dusty Springfield" (You Don't Have To Say You Love Me)

 

Just keep up your subscription to the double dutch directory and you can't go wrong. tongue out icon

 

 

[NickF 0]

Punters twisting the speakers around.

 

That gets my goat.

 

Even when its not loud they seem to want to turn them instead of moving away. Ive even had some plonker unplug one before.

 

The worst is when im in a nightclub and one person asks you to turn in down! :wall:

 

[eazy 0]

still my favorite is the ( here ave ya got this one and sticking there phone in my ear ) aaahhhhh !!!!

[KS Roadshow 0]

still my favorite is the ( here ave ya got this one and sticking there phone in my ear ) aaahhhhh !!!!

 

 

 

thats if you can hear it on there phone then you say no and there reply is :cense: dj i wouldnt book you

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Ste Owens 0]

I always think the best one is, grandad sitting down the front infront of the speaker and mouths 'turn it down its too loud', MOVE AWAY THEN GRRRRRR

 

 

[deejaymitch 0]

Or the one by "that fellow with the black hair, something about love. It was in the charts last year"

 

And the punter who thinks he/she knows the title ......... but doesn't.

 

I've played "The La La song" (Can't Get You Out Of My Head)

 

"Walk On" (You'll Never Walk Alone)

 

"Believe Me by Dusty Springfield" (You Don't Have To Say You Love Me)

 

Just keep up your subscription to the double dutch directory and you can't go wrong. tongue out icon

 

 

To The Left by Destiny's Child (Irreplaceable by Beyonce)

 

Or, even better:

 

"Have you any (artist's name)?"

"Yes, what would you like?"

"Number 5 of his/her album"

"Which album?"

"I don't know"

 

Usually for an artist who has released 30 studio albums and countless compilations.

[NickF 0]

I also missed off the list the Mute who comes up and says nothing but holds infront of you their phone with an unsent text message with their request in.

[Thats entertainment 0]

and at the end of the night the 2 punters chatting right infront of the door you need to load your gear out...

even though they see you struggling to get through with your speakers as they carry on standing there :dan:

[Spear 0]

Or the couple of drunks that insist on trying to help you pack up and carry the gear despite you're protests and the fact they can hardly stand up :wall: :nono:

[DJJEG 0]

I also missed off the list the Mute who comes up and says nothing but holds infront of you their phone with an unsent text message with their request in.

I always say lets have a look then press delete!!!! tongue out icon

[robbiedj 0]

Ah, don't you just love them all! tongue out icon

 

 

My big nightmare is that one night I will arrive at a venue ................ and they will ALL be there! :scared:

[DJJEG 0]

and at the end of the night the 2 punters chatting right infront of the door you need to load your gear out...

even though they see you struggling to get through with your speakers as they carry on standing there :dan:

Here Here, if they dont move after the 3rd excuse me please i use the speaker to move them :ads:

[eazy 0]

god bless them each and every one lol where would we be without them

[deejaymitch 0]

god bless them each and every one lol where would we be without them

 

You've changed your tune!!! Although I suppose that's your job :dan+ju:

[exbutlinred82 0]

 

 

Have you got that song with Hello in the middle???

 

 

mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

[UKHero 0]

Had a girl come up to me on NYE dance floor quite full and said "Do you have any good music" To which I replied "NO!" then pretended to do some work on the laptop.

 

Or the one who refuses to leave your side until you have some song that they request.

 

"OOO hold on I will think of another" So how important were the previous 5 requested tunes to you then????

 

Have you got the one that goes, then they get as close to your ear as they can and shout out some lyrics that are pure distortion mixed with there spittle. Best retort to that is to get close to there ear and go "NO

SORRY!!!!" lol

 

Or the guy who puts his arm around your neck and tells you what this crowd need is some Northern Soul, "I guarantee they will all dance to that" he says like a plonker you play it dance floor empty and your man is at the bar singing his head off....

 

To be fair I guess we are picking on the minority as the majority are nice folk who treat us and our kit with respect. But it is the minority we all remember, I guess as the punter only remembers the bad cheesy Disco's we only remember the ignorant little :cense: who show no respect and act like spoilt children lol.

 

Why do we do this again ??? Oh yeah we love music lol...

 

Nik

 

[NRG Roadshow 0]

I always think the best one is, grandad sitting down the front infront of the speaker and mouths 'turn it down its too loud', MOVE AWAY THEN GRRRRRR

 

Yup, that happens all the time.....

 

They are normally the first ones into the room, have the pick of any chair in the whole place.......they plonk themselfs at the nearest table to the speakers.....

Then Whinge coz its too loud!!!!! WHY!!!!

 

and at the end of the night the 2 punters chatting right infront of the door you need to load your gear out...

even though they see you struggling to get through with your speakers as they carry on standing there

 

Why do they do that????

I feel like saying "Are you deliberately trying to :cense: me off? Are you that drunk that you dont even realise your in the way? Or are you just that ignorant and your deliberately getting in my way.....now for :cense: sake move!!!!!!" Grrrrr :paula:

[rictic 0]

 

Or the guy who puts his arm around your neck and tells you what this crowd need is some Northern Soul, "I guarantee they will all dance to that" he says like a plonker you play it dance floor empty and your man is at the bar singing his head off....

 

Nik

 

 

ha ha ha peeing myself now, he has obviously had me at his disco one time or another tongue out icon :Thumbup: :blameless: